Kevin Rodgers, 32 years old, one of the most prominent and bombastic coaches in the dating advice industry. He’s got a vast experience in online dating and found his match via the Internet so he has a particularly inside angle to the notion of finding a girlfriend online. In this article he shares the hidden pitfalls and tricks of online dating.
Everyone wants to know how to find love online. Not just a person to go out with from time to time, but rather a woman who will love you in spite of all your imperfections and will strive to build a common future with you. If you are tired of being alone and ready to build a lasting relationship, don’t overlook the possibility of finding a girlfriend online. Digital technologies and smartphones have a lot of to offer us.
Contrary to the widespread belief, lots of people found their beloved ones online. In 2017 around 17% of all online datings in US resulted in marriages. A promising result, isn’t it?
Before we begin, let me clarify an important thing. Do you realize what kind of relationship are you looking for? The answer to this question will be a cornerstone of your further behavior and tactics. See, there is a huge difference between looking for a one-night-stand and a long lasting relationship with a good woman you’d like to spend you whole life with till death do you part. Once you realize your real motive, the things will become easier for sure.
This time, I will tell you from my own experience how to find your perfect match online. Just keep on reading.
1. Be your authentic self
Table of Contents
This mantra has been chasing all of us at every turn. We have heard this so many times that now we just don’t give a hoot how important it actually is. Unlike common hookups, a lasting connection depends heavily on being yourself. Being yourself means confidence and commitment to serious liabilities. Being yourself is courage and self-sufficiency. Believe me, if you try to play somebody else’s role, you’ll inevitably fail. No woman will be impressed by your acting talent either. Moreover, giving yourself out to be somebody else means your disconfidence and animus towards yourself. To win the heart of a woman act naturally and tell her the truths. Still, not overdo. She doesn’t need to know all your previous life story. Cool down and keep going the way you are. This will provide you with more brownie points.
2. Selective doesn’t mean picky
This correlates with the previous tip. So, once again. If you are a confident person with high self-esteem, you got to understand what is acceptable for you and what is not. You may act somehow controversial or even a little bit strange, not being afraid that some women will not like you for your jokes, style, music preferences etc. The very notion of online dating means that you may select and find your amazing one. There is no need to please everyone. You have a wide range, so become selective.
3. Be cheerful
Definitely, you know that dating isn’t a simple thing. And usually heartfelt dramas couldn’t be predicted or avoided. You might have had negative experience in the past so it influences your current relations with women. Still, shit happens and nobody should pay for your previously broken heart. Setting up a new relation means positive attitude. Online dating usually takes your time and energy, so be sure that you keep it in a pleasant and positive vibe. I doubt if any woman would like to listen to the weepy stories about your ex and cure your broken heart. The worst begging one can imagine.
4. Create a flawless profile
Well, do not take the metaphor above word-for-word. Of course, flawless means no grammar mistakes but there is another thing I want to say here – you should figure out what kind of things you want to tell in your profile so women could understand who you are and what it’s like to go along with you. Of course, your story should be engaging and vivid. No need to talk about some crazy things you do – better show them. This includes your profile photos too. Make sure that all photos you’ve posted reflects your life as it is not the life you pretend to. These kinds of things are not easy at all. The same old game, the more truthful your profile is, the higher chances are to find the one you have been looking for so long. Undoubtedly, paying attention to your profile is worth it!
5. Have a phone chat before real date
Texting via online dating sites is intriguing and fascinating. Though, this happens because we often make a woman out to be the one she isn’t. The only way to check is there a real magic between you two before the real date is having a telephone chat. That’s the easiest way to reveal if there is a stuff to talk about with her. If chatting takes about 15-20 minutes and you want it more, then this is an unmistakable sign of love chemistry between you two.
6. Everything has it’s time
Rushing sex relations is the mistake men often do. The point is that if you want to establish a valuable connection, you’d better wait until your sexual chemistry will burst out a little bit latter. The first thing you need to take care of is making friends with your love interest. Still, you should be careful, because the chances are to trap into the friend-zone. Online connection has much in common with the offline dating: be honest, trust your partner and simply enjoy your time spent together, instead of rushing her to the bed.
7. Know the importance of moving on
While looking for a dream woman, you will get to chat with many other ladies. Some of them will be attractive, interesting, smart. You will meet a lot of good women, actually. Sometimes you might even think that the game is over and you have already found your perfect match. Still, the real deep connection doesn’t happen. And you go on dating with a good woman, not more. Not your love, passion, dream. At some point you may stick to the idea that this is she who will bring the light into your life. Though miracle disappears and soon after the only thing you can think about is how to walk out on her. So the useful skill you’d better get to avoid dramas and broken hearts – learn how to understand where to stop and move on. Love is not a thing that happens, it grows and evolves, so if nothing of this happens to you, the only way to keep your carma clear is to say honest good-bye without going too far with the relationship that sooner or latter will cease.
I hope that these tips will help you to understand how to find a girlfriend online. As you see, online dating is almost the same as the offline, so keep trying, searching and working on your relations!